April 2013

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Complete Diagnois and Chemo

So yesterday was a really long day, that is why I'm just getting to this now. I first met with my Oncologist at 9:20. Side note: Why do they make the appointment for 9:20, tell me to be there at 9:10 and then don't call me in until 9:30? I don't get it. Anyway so the Fellow Oncologist that I'm seeing came in and went over my results of the PET scan.

This is the photo of my scan. In the upper right hand side, (my left) you see some glowing round spots. Those are my cancerous lymph nodes. Below that, in my chest, I have a light glow that is more cancer. The little glow in my chest puts me at a diagnosis of Hodgkin's Lymphoma Stage II a. That is pretty good. I honestly thought I would be stage I, but I'm ok with two. They are going to both get the crud kicked out of them. I'll beat it. So with that being said we talked treatment. They have been running test in Germany on patients with Chemo and they were giving them different doses at different times and a bunch of other mumbo jumbo that I didn't pick up on cause' I was out of my mind, but anyway these test that they have ran is allowing me to have a shorter treatment period. Yippee. I will have 2 months of chemo. My treatments are every two weeks. After Chemo I will have 3 weeks of radiation. That is 5 days a week, Monday through Friday. And then we will be on the road to remission. Yay!!!

After that appointment I had to have a pulmonary function test done. I had to walk through the maze of the hospital and make my way to the U. That test was interesting. It reminded me of the machine in Monsters Inc. when they try to suck the screams out of Mike. That test was great. :) After that we went to grab a very quick lunch and for you locals, if you haven't tried the Corner Bakery you should. It's my new favorite place. The Club Panini was awesome. Their mini cookies are great too. OK now I'm hungry. ;) After lunch I drove back up to Huntsman to start Chemo. Now I have been told that I have lovely veins. They never have a problem giving me an IV. Now this time the put it on my wrist and that hurt like H**l. I will never let them do that again. I couldn't move my hand with out it hurting. I actually bawled my eyes out with she did it too. It couldn't have had anything to do with my emotions. So When we finally started the meds it wasn't too bad. They have to push one med in and that took forever. They call it Big Red, or the Red Devil. It's the one that makes you lose your hair. It also makes you pee Red. Go Utes Baby!!! =) We are big Ute fans in our house. On my last drug of the day I had complications. It burned. They used saline to dilute it and it was all better. After my chemo I was suppose to have a echo that I didn't get done in time for so we get to do that another day. All said and done I didn't pull in to my driveway till 6:00 and that was in time to get the family ready for the Blue and Gold Banquet. It was a long, long night. Thank you for all of you who are following you. I love your support. Remember violet/purple is the color to support Hodgkin's Lymphoma. Love you all

New Hairdo

Ok, I've been keeping the kids informed about everything going on. We have been talking to them and getting their feelings on everything and what we found out was that Nolan was afraid for me to lose my hair. Apparently Mommy won't look as hot as Daddy does bald. Well I thought about it and I've been reading things on Chemo and a lot of people have said that it makes it easier to cut your hair before you lose it. So well that is what I did. My mom and four year old daughter decided to do it with me. My daughter and I also put in purple extensions for fun. Violet is the color for Hodgkin's Lymphoma.

I love my mom for going with me, but I am so proud that my 4 year old daughter wanted to do it too. She first said she would go bald, but I told her no. Then she said she wanted Ellen Degeneres' hair, but we settled on the bob. I think it suits her better.


Thursday, March 24, 2011


So here I was on my way to my PET scan. I received a phone call from one of my Oncologist. He actually had a diagnosis for me. I have Classical Hodgkin's Lymphoma. Yay! OK, that really sucks, but it's also awesome. Yes I have Cancer, but I have a curable Cancer. How cool is that. I don't have my treatments all mapped out yet, but it will be a wild ride. I have a clinic appointment on Tuesday morning. I'll find out more info about my diagnosis. Then I start my chemo at 1:00 pm. That will be 5 hours. Yuck. 5 hours? Well I guess that is 5 hours away from dishes and laundry right?

So about my PET scan, they forgot to call me and give me some information about it. It's a good thing I have friends who have gone through this. I needed to fast. Luckily I did that. =) When I got there they put me into a room and told me to relax. They gave me a IV and pushed the glucose in. She then instructed me to relax and do nothing for an hour and half. I couldn't read, write, or play on my phone. Yes I had to turn my phone off for like 2 hours today. It was horrible. They didn't want me using my brain. I know this is shocking, but that was actually harder than I thought. I just took a nap. =) A very uncomfortable one at that. So after that they took about 20-30 mins of pictures and then I went home. Fun day right? Ok till next time.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011


Ok so there really isn't a word for my title. It's more of a grumble. My Biopsy results were not back so we don't have a lot of info. So why did they make this appointment so soon? I guess it was to make me feel uncomfortable and to feel me up. I got my second breast exam since I found the lump. This is not fun to do. I also had my groin lymph nodes checked out. I'm not sure what would have been better, a man or woman. This time it was a man. I really hate going to the doctors. They are still calling it lymphoma and this time they actually mentioned Non-Hodgkins. The Oncologist said it looks like it could be Hodgkins or Non-Hodgkins, but if it is Non-Hodgkins it's the curable kind. Ok how come they can tell me that much, but they can't give me a definite diagnosis? AAAHHHHH!!!! I HATE WAITING!!!!! OK with all that being said, if everything goes well with insurance I have my PET scan on Thursday at 8:15. What is a PET scan you ask? Good question. PET scan: Positron emission tomography scan. A procedure in which a small amount of radioactive glucose (sugar) is injected in to a vein, and a scanner is used to make detailed, computerized pictures of areas inside the body where the glucose is used. Because cancer cells often use more glucose than normal cells, the pictures can be used to find cancer cells in the body.

I also start my chemo on Tuesday. They are waiting for the biopsy results to determine what time and what meds. I'm frustrated that I don't have a definitive diagnosis, but I'm told I should be happy that all the possible dianosis' are curable. Sure that is good news, but couldn't they have said "wow we screwed up, you don't have lymphoma, it looks like the Easter Bunny hid a egg in you neck." OK that's not possible, but it would be cool right? A yummy Cadbury Egg. =)

So I'm mad, frustrated, sad, emotional, and scared. I'm told that I will lose my hair and that seems to be what the kids are afraid of, so I'm going to cut it. I'm getting the Ellen haircut. Maybe this weekend. Anyone wanna join me? I'll cry. Last month I decided to let my hair grow out. Oh well it will grow back. It's a good thing I look good with short hair. So that is my rant for the the day. Don't worry I'll be back FYE. =)

Monday, March 21, 2011

The Surgery Has Passed...

Well I'm out of surgery and I'm alive. :)Duh. So my morning started at 4:50 a.m. I could here Clint getting ready for work. I looked at the time and my alarm was going off in 10 minutes, so I just decided to get up. I was really excited. It felt like I was going to Disneyland. Not!!! It was easy to get ready. I wasn't allowed to wear make-up so that made it quick. I through my hair in a pony tail and I was ready to go.

I live 3.57 mi, 9 mins from the Huntsman Cancer Hospital. Yes, very convenient don't you think? It will be nice for treatments. Ok, so anyway My mom and I arrived right on time and I was the third person signed in, but for some reason they checked me in last. Maybe they are were going oldest to youngest. :) They had me take a pregnancy test and good news, I'm not pregnant. :D If you're not familiar with the Huntsman Center or the University Hospital let me tell you they are wonderful. One thing you do have to look out for though is it is a teaching school. I have wonderful veins. Needles go in great. The student putting my IV in had a lil problem. Not too bad, it just made it hard to listen to the Resident talking to me. Everyone I talked to came in and asked me, "now what are we doing today?" "and what side is that on?" Well I was bored telling them the same answer so when it was time to tell the anesthesiologist I told him I was getting a boob job. He thought it was pretty funny since my Doctor is a ENT surgeon. Well bad news is I didn't get the boob job. Maybe for my next surgery, next spring. =) After they put my IV in and I signed the paperwork they wheeled me into surgery. Ok that operating room was freezing. They put all the cold stickers on me for the monitors and put the oxygen mask on me and shortly after that, I was out. I don't remember anything else till I woke up in recovery. I heard them talk about turning the table and I was out before it was turned and I didn't even see the Doctor.

So my mom talked to the Dr and he said that he didn't remove the large lymph node we had originally planned. He took two smaller ones of the same consistency. The Doctor said that there were more lymph nodes in the mass than we originally saw on the CT. Crazy stuff.

So tomorrow I meet with the Medical Oncologist. So more news tomorrow. Till Then I'm happily medicated. =)

Friday, March 18, 2011

Surgery Scheduled

Well I check into the hospital at 6:00 a.m. Yuck that's too early. The good news is I'm the first one on the schedule so I won't have to wait for any delays. I'm not suppose to wear make-up or jewelry. This is going to be a little different then my previous surgery's. This time I'll be totally knocked out under general anesthetic. Yikes. I'm a little scared. It will be a small incision and then stitched up. I can't lift the kids and I can't drive for 24 hrs. I'm going to lay in bed and watch Burlesque again. :) I'll let you know how it goes on Monday. Oh and my appointment with the Oncologist is on Tuesday at 8:00 a.m. Till Then

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Today I'm Mad...

I'm really trying to keep myself busy and to not dwell on the crap that is going on. But let's face it. For anyone who knows me, that is really hard to do. I Joke about being a memeber of the "surgery of the year club", but I'm serious. In March of 2009 I had a hole in my heart closed. In March of 2010 I had a immbolization of a AVM that is in my right lung. Now I will have a minor surgery to remove a lymph node that is cancerous. Geez, I wonder what 2012 will bring. I never in a million years thought I would have Cancer. I guess nobody really does. I know I'm going to live through it. I have the Faith that I will. In the mean time it is going to drive me crazy. I'm scared, mad, and a total emotional wreck. I try to stay positive and I've done fairly well. I will keep trying. I'm trying to live one day at a time and not think about what will happen because I really don't know. It's still a waiting game. I know I'm rambling, but it's my blog so I can do that so ha ha. So I'm going to go and find some chocolate. =)

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

My First Appointment at Huntsman...

Well today's appointment just left me wondering and asking more questions. I did meet the surgeon and my appointment for surgery is sceduled for Monday, March 21, 2011. It will be a somewhat simple procedure to remove all or some of my lymph node. Then they will do a biopsy to find out exactly what type of lymphoma I have. I then will meet with a Medical Oncologist at the end of the week to go over the test results and discuss treatment. I feel kind of numb and in limbo. I know there is more that I need to know I just have to wait and take it one day at a time. I'm not good at waiting.

I did however get to see the results from the CT. I can feel a small lymph node and a very large one just above my clavical. The Dr showed me another small one and looking at the CT we were able to see another very large one set deeper inside. I thought that the one I can feel was huge, but it's just a baby compared to the one inside. It turns out that I have a whole little cluster.

Thanks for following me. Please keep me in your prayers and I will keep you updated through out this scary adventure.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Ok let's try this again.

Ok, so I really suck at this whole blogging thing, but Clint thought I should start. We have a lot of craziness going on at home. Let me back up, we are living in Salt Lake City and Clint is going back to school. The boys are loving school and Jaelene has started pre-school and loves it. She says that her favorite day is when she has to go to school. Madalie has decided that she wants to be potty trained. It's great. She is doing pretty good at it too. Ok to the latest news.

In January I started to have a strange feeling in my throat. It felt like I was being strangled or I had a golf ball stuck in it. I went to the Dr and she took a throat culture and checked for swollen lymph nodes. She couldn't find anything wrong so she gave a prescription for a Benedryl, Mylanta, and lidocaine mixture. I was suppose to gargle it. All it did was make my throat numb. It was dumb. She said that if it persist to see a ENT specialist. When I got home I started to google my symptoms and I found out that I was having anxiety attacks. I made an appointment to see my Dr. the following week. She checked my thyroid and for swollen lymph nodes again and then she scheduled a follow-up appointment for 3 weeks later. Before my next appointment I found a lump on my neck just above my clavicle. I immediately made an appointment for the next day.

At the appointment the Dr measured the lump and said it was probably a swollen lymph node and that we should watch it for the next 6-8 weeks. I went the following week to meet with with my regular Dr about my anxiety. I mentioned the lump and she examined it and told me that she didn't want to wait 6-8 weeks and she scheduled me a CT. My CT results showed a large mass in my neck which was a total duh! I could see it looking in the mirror. From then the ordered a ultrasound to see if they could do a biopsy with ultrasound or if they would need to do it with CT. They could do it with ultrasound and set a biopsy up for the following week. They did my biopsy on March 4th and my Dr called me and said she would like to meet with me in her office next week. (apparently she is only working Fridays) When she said she wanted to meet with me in the office I freaked out. If the biopsy was negative they wouldn't want me to come in to the office. Right? That's how it usually is right. I was freaking out. I couldn't believe I had to wait for a week to find anything out. All she would tell me was my test results showed atypical cells and that they wanted a bigger sample to run another biopsy. I had to play the waiting game. I hate waiting.

On Monday I received a call from the Biopsy Coordinator, she just wanted to see how I was doing. I let her know I was fine. I was just a little tender. I mentioned that I had a appointment on Friday and that they wanted a larger sample they would schedule another biopsy on Friday. She said why are they waiting so long, the results are not something that we want and that she could probably get me in the next day. I started to really freak out at this point. That's just how I am.

In the next few days I received a call from my Dr's office and they said since I had an appoint with Dr. Hunt I didn't need to see Dr. Baedan on Friday. At this point I'm confused because I have never heard of Dr. Hunt. I asked if he was up at the University hospital and she said no, he was up at the Huntsman Cancer Institute. Ok now I'm upset. Why do they have me going there? I called the Biopsy Coordinator and asked her if she could give me any info. Where do I go and what is going on. She didn't want to over step her boundaries but I convinced her it was my info and I would rather hear it on the phone and to not wait. She read the report to me. It said that it was highly suspicious for Hodgkin's Lymphoma. Ok now I'm really freaked. Why do we have to wait so long. It turns out that my Dr was the one that made the appointment with Dr. Hunt and was going to explain everything to me in the office on Friday. Nice way to find out. My Dr. said my appointment is scheduled on Tuesday the 15th (the day before my 33rd birthday). It is a surgery consultation and they will be removing my lymph node. And then I will start chemo. So right now I'm trying to find out what I can (even though they told me not to google it). I've been told by a few Dr's and nurses that they wouldn't have given me a name of the cancer if I didn't have it. I've also been told that if I was to choose my cancer this would be the one to choose. It has a very good success rate. It's just more of the waiting game. I'm not very good at blogging, but I'm going to try to do this to keep family and friends informed and for my own record. Thank you for all the love, support, and prayers.