@#$%&*!

Ok so there really isn't a word for my title. It's more of a grumble. My Biopsy results were not back so we don't have a lot of info. So why did they make this appointment so soon? I guess it was to make me feel uncomfortable and to feel me up. I got my second breast exam since I found the lump. This is not fun to do. I also had my groin lymph nodes checked out. I'm not sure what would have been better, a man or woman. This time it was a man. I really hate going to the doctors. They are still calling it lymphoma and this time they actually mentioned Non-Hodgkins. The Oncologist said it looks like it could be Hodgkins or Non-Hodgkins, but if it is Non-Hodgkins it's the curable kind. Ok how come they can tell me that much, but they can't give me a definite diagnosis? AAAHHHHH!!!! I HATE WAITING!!!!! OK with all that being said, if everything goes well with insurance I have my PET scan on Thursday at 8:15. What is a PET scan you ask? Good question. PET scan: Positron emission tomography scan. A procedure in which a small amount of radioactive glucose (sugar) is injected in to a vein, and a scanner is used to make detailed, computerized pictures of areas inside the body where the glucose is used. Because cancer cells often use more glucose than normal cells, the pictures can be used to find cancer cells in the body.

I also start my chemo on Tuesday. They are waiting for the biopsy results to determine what time and what meds. I'm frustrated that I don't have a definitive diagnosis, but I'm told I should be happy that all the possible dianosis' are curable. Sure that is good news, but couldn't they have said "wow we screwed up, you don't have lymphoma, it looks like the Easter Bunny hid a egg in you neck." OK that's not possible, but it would be cool right? A yummy Cadbury Egg. =)

So I'm mad, frustrated, sad, emotional, and scared. I'm told that I will lose my hair and that seems to be what the kids are afraid of, so I'm going to cut it. I'm getting the Ellen haircut. Maybe this weekend. Anyone wanna join me? I'll cry. Last month I decided to let my hair grow out. Oh well it will grow back. It's a good thing I look good with short hair. So that is my rant for the the day. Don't worry I'll be back FYE. =)